The Infectious Disease of Distance
Grande, R. (2012). The Distance Between Us: A Memoir. New York, NY: Washington Square Press. (pp. 163-249)
At this point of the book, I am beginning to really understand the meaning behind the title, The Distance Between Us. In my first post, I thought the distance was between Reyna and her father in the United States. In the second post, it seemed the distance was focused on Reyna and her mother. However, now I understand there is distance present within her entire family. Immigration has caused physical, as well as mental distance between Reyna and her father, mother, siblings, grandmother, aunts and uncles. Here we see the infectious pain that spreads throughout immigrant families. Again, Reyna is offering a personal insight into the effects of illegal immigration. Although readers may still feel it is wrong to illegally enter our country, it's impossible to close this book without a developed empathy for the risks and consequences people assume when they decide to make their way across the border. It makes you think, if these people are willing to tear their families apart, risk death to cross, and surrender their life savings for promises of illegal passage into the United States, there must be a complicated and important reason for their immigration. Currently, many politicians are treating immigrants as criminals. Even now, as thousands of immigrants make their way to the United States border from Honduras, we hear on the news that this migration is an attack on our country. What we don't hear is why they are traveling to the United States--what their lives had been like in Honduras and what they risked for the journey to La Otra Lado. Again there is the disparity between identity: the United States, a nation of immigrants, and the United States, a nation with closed borders.
Although Reyna's childhood dreams have come true, and she is now living with her father, the distance between them is painfully apparent. Her father has no interest in getting to know Reyna or her other siblings. However, he is strict about education. He tells them that if they don't make all A's, he will send them back to Mexico. The kids don't seem worried, as they were all good students in Mexico. However, now they were in a country where they don't speak the language, in a school 10x+ bigger than their previous school. They are all placed in ESL. Reyna's experience in ESL seems frustrating, but not debilitating. In her elementary school, she sits in a corner of the class with other ESL students and a Spanish teacher. She is very intelligent, but her ESL group is beginning with the alphabet. Although she does not say it, I think this embarrasses Reyna. She also is given picture books to read while she longs for the Mexican literature and fairy tales she read back home. She experiences bullying because of her lack of English, her strange accent, and her less than fashionable clothes. In general, this is how I assumed school life would be for someone like Reyna. What is surprising to me is how resilient she is. While Reyna's father is practically never engaging his kids with meaningful conversation, there are a few glimpses into his mind. When Reyna brings home a sax, which she will learn to play in band class, her father seems nostalgic. He shares with her when he was nine he played drums in one of his classes, and he really enjoyed it. However at the end of the year, his father told him he was old enough to work in the fields, and he has been working ever since. Perhaps this is one of the reasons his belief in the importance of education is so unwavering. He repeatedly says education is the gateway to careers and good jobs. Reyna's father has not been in the United States long. I think he's so aware of this because of how difficult his own job is. He does manual labor and receives little benefits and little pay. Although his is physically and emotionally abusive to his children, especially when he is drinking, he doesn't want them to financially struggle as he does.
Reyna's distance to her mother is even more obvious, even though she has recently moved back to the United States. Her mother does not tell her children, and after being in the United States for months, their father lets them know their mother lives in a different part of the same city. When the kids go visit, they witness the failed promises of the United States. They had always heard how beautiful the United States was. It was the land of money; they even heard stories when they were little that money literally grew on trees. The United States quickly equated to happiness in their minds' dictionary. However their mom's neighborhood is full of drunks, homeless people, and dirty roads. Their mother's one room apartment is littered with trash and roaches. Although she works in a garment factory, she also collects recyclables to sell to earn enough to live. Reyna and her siblings see that the United States does not necessarily promise a happy life. This is something I thought about in the beginning of this book when Reyna, her family, and her school friends would romanticize the United States. Yes, the United States may objectively has more job opportunities than Mexico. However, this does not mean life in the United States is easy, especially for someone living here illegally. They can easily be taken advantage of by their employer, which may mean extremely low wages and no benefits. (which is Reyna's mother's situation) Housing is typically restricted to certain areas that are poorly funded. The kids compare their mother's new life in American to her life in Mexico--it looks eerily similar. Then why live in America? Because America is defined, and defines herself, as a land of possibilities. The American dream says where you are today does not have to be where you are tomorrow. It seems a bit ironic. I think the American dream compels many immigrants like Reyna's mom to come and live in the United States, even if they are struggling to survive. At the same time, these immigrants are seen as unpatriotic. What's more patriotic than chasing the American dream?
Grande, R. (2012). The Distance Between Us: A Memoir. New York, NY: Washington Square Press. (pp. 163-249)
Although Reyna's childhood dreams have come true, and she is now living with her father, the distance between them is painfully apparent. Her father has no interest in getting to know Reyna or her other siblings. However, he is strict about education. He tells them that if they don't make all A's, he will send them back to Mexico. The kids don't seem worried, as they were all good students in Mexico. However, now they were in a country where they don't speak the language, in a school 10x+ bigger than their previous school. They are all placed in ESL. Reyna's experience in ESL seems frustrating, but not debilitating. In her elementary school, she sits in a corner of the class with other ESL students and a Spanish teacher. She is very intelligent, but her ESL group is beginning with the alphabet. Although she does not say it, I think this embarrasses Reyna. She also is given picture books to read while she longs for the Mexican literature and fairy tales she read back home. She experiences bullying because of her lack of English, her strange accent, and her less than fashionable clothes. In general, this is how I assumed school life would be for someone like Reyna. What is surprising to me is how resilient she is. While Reyna's father is practically never engaging his kids with meaningful conversation, there are a few glimpses into his mind. When Reyna brings home a sax, which she will learn to play in band class, her father seems nostalgic. He shares with her when he was nine he played drums in one of his classes, and he really enjoyed it. However at the end of the year, his father told him he was old enough to work in the fields, and he has been working ever since. Perhaps this is one of the reasons his belief in the importance of education is so unwavering. He repeatedly says education is the gateway to careers and good jobs. Reyna's father has not been in the United States long. I think he's so aware of this because of how difficult his own job is. He does manual labor and receives little benefits and little pay. Although his is physically and emotionally abusive to his children, especially when he is drinking, he doesn't want them to financially struggle as he does.
Reyna's distance to her mother is even more obvious, even though she has recently moved back to the United States. Her mother does not tell her children, and after being in the United States for months, their father lets them know their mother lives in a different part of the same city. When the kids go visit, they witness the failed promises of the United States. They had always heard how beautiful the United States was. It was the land of money; they even heard stories when they were little that money literally grew on trees. The United States quickly equated to happiness in their minds' dictionary. However their mom's neighborhood is full of drunks, homeless people, and dirty roads. Their mother's one room apartment is littered with trash and roaches. Although she works in a garment factory, she also collects recyclables to sell to earn enough to live. Reyna and her siblings see that the United States does not necessarily promise a happy life. This is something I thought about in the beginning of this book when Reyna, her family, and her school friends would romanticize the United States. Yes, the United States may objectively has more job opportunities than Mexico. However, this does not mean life in the United States is easy, especially for someone living here illegally. They can easily be taken advantage of by their employer, which may mean extremely low wages and no benefits. (which is Reyna's mother's situation) Housing is typically restricted to certain areas that are poorly funded. The kids compare their mother's new life in American to her life in Mexico--it looks eerily similar. Then why live in America? Because America is defined, and defines herself, as a land of possibilities. The American dream says where you are today does not have to be where you are tomorrow. It seems a bit ironic. I think the American dream compels many immigrants like Reyna's mom to come and live in the United States, even if they are struggling to survive. At the same time, these immigrants are seen as unpatriotic. What's more patriotic than chasing the American dream?
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